I hardly ever actually pick up a newspaper and I rarely watch the news on television. So to stay current, I rely a lot on NPR, Time magazine, and a few websites, including the Chicago Tribune, The New York Times, CNN, and (of course) The Onion.
Well, I'm beginning to doubt one of my choices. I was browsing the CNN site a few minutes ago and of the twelve so-called "top stories," here are eight of them:
• Uhm, you should expect fat in your KFC, judge says
• Woman, 65, charged with taping teen sex acts
• KKK witness speaks from the grave
• Sleepyhead boy saves his mother from fire
• Critics not amused by British queen’s photo
• Reagan diary gives new take on insanity
• Prom night comes 60 years late for sweeties
• Britney Spears takes baby step back on stage
Switch them around a bit, and they're just as goofy:
• Britney Spears gives new take on insanity
• Reagan charged with taping teen sex acts from the grave
• KKK witness not amused 60 years late
• Sleepyhead boy should expect fat on prom night
• Uhm, British queen not amused in KFC, judge says
Now that would be news.
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2 comments:
Good God. This is why I only pick up the paper for the crossword puzzle.
Yours are so much better, and more plausible. I don't do the news either. Not on paper, not on TV. Not even on the internet, unless it actually involves, you know, news? Celebrity antics are not news.
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